Quick Guide To: Being a Good (Okay, Decent) Wife

Well, clearly you need to have a sense of humor. Man, if I didn’t have any sort of sense of humor, my marriage would’ve been doomed from the start!

Alright, so I started thinking of ideas on what I could write about. It’s been a really long time since I have written a really good blog post. As you can see, I have been posting a lot about health and fitness focused ideas. That’s mostly because my life revolves around my faith, my family, my job, and then health and fitness. And instead of going on and on about my son (who is the cutest thing, bee-tee-dubs), I decided to go a different route and talk about what I’ve learned over the past year on being a decent wife.

Hey, it’s not that serious and I will joke around from time to time but maybe someone will take something away from this post and think, ‘Wow, maybe THAT is what I was missing!’ or you will just think I am crazy which is TOTALLY okay! Either way, this just my idea over the past year on how I have been able to keep my marriage afloat with the things I do.

Your husband needs love just as much as you do.

It’s TRUE. You want all the romantic things to never end. You think about the things he did for you when you were just dating and even when you were engaged and you want them to NEVER go away. Believe it or not, your husband doesn’t want the things you do for him to go away either. On the same token, he’s a man. They are pretty laid back when it comes to this. The things they see as “romantic…” nevermind. They don’t see things as romantic. :P But they do enjoy loving things such as, kisses, hugs, touches. Most men are physical beings. It’s not just about sex here, ladies. Granted, that helps but it’s about being physical and letting him FEEL your love. It’s just as important to him to feel that love as it is for us to hear him say, “I love you.”

Don’t suddenly change who you are.

Okay, this one is a little difficult. I mean, I was pregnant the first year of our marriage. At least for half of our first year. I changed A LOT. My face, my body, my mood…lots of changes. But there are some women out there that think everything will be different if they get married. Like, magically you become this old couple that doesn’t do anything. If you’re anything like my husband and I, we became that old couple LONG before marriage was ever brought into the picture! I know, there are old couples that probably get out of the house way more often than we do, but that’s okay. Either way, don’t expect everything to change just because you have a ring, a marriage certificate, and a husband. You both are still the same people, enjoy that. Things will change over time anyway…especially with kids.

Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Hmmm, I am pretty sure that’s a book I read in junior high. I should listen to that book more often! Either way, this is very true. If you’re someone like me who experiences anxiety and gets stressed out so easily, this doesn’t always work. But it can. If you are newly married or about to take the deep plunge, many of you may be getting ready to move in together for the first time…ever. And that is going to be a HUGE change for you both. Like I said, I am STILL working on this one but I know it needs to be done. And when I can chillax a little, he’s at ease and things run smoother. For example, I am very picky about where things go. I like to be organized and have a place for things. I walk into the door from work; boots off and put away, keys hung on the key holder by the door, wallet on the shelf by the door, lunchbag unpacked and put away in its proper home. My husband on the other hand…stuff everywhere. That’s really just how men are. Even the more organized ones, they are still pretty spacey when it comes to that kind of thing. Over the past year, I learned that I need to just let it be. If I want to have things put in a certain place, it’s really not that big of a deal for me to just do it myself. He works all day too and the last thing he wants to do is come home to a wife who is going to talk his ear off about the fact that he forgot something (again).

Speaking of being more organized…don’t move his stuff

This isn’t a long one but remember how I said I am really organized? Things need to have a home. You pick something up and you put it back where you got it. That’s my logic. Hubster? Not so much. And it’s okay. But really, don’t move anything unless you are ready to hear the, “Honey? Where are my -_insert object here¬¬¬_?” It’s going to happen. And you are just going to have to deal. I guess, it’s along the same lines of not sweating the small stuff. Your husband is basically going to be lost if he can’t find what he’s looking for. But what you should realize is…he probably just forgot where he put something anyway so if you moved it, it’s not a big deal.

I really am not just trying to insult my husband in this post. But…he’s funny and awesome and these are the things he does. :P

Let him feel useful

This is seriously something I didn’t notice until we were married. We lived together before for about a year before we were married but it wasn’t until we moved into our house that I saw this. He wants to do things around the house. If it’s something that needs to be fixed with a hammer, some nails, his power tools…whatever, he wants to do it. Like, seriously…I know how to do a lot of things around the house but he wants me to let him do it. He’s built me some shelves for the wall in the living room, put together some bookshelves and things for organizing the house, and he’s made some parrallettes (I really don’t know how to spell that, haha) for the gym. He’s painted our son’s nursery (and it turned out beautiful might I add) and he was a perfectionist about it. It’s actually pretty cute. But this is what I mean about letting him feel useful – Like I said, I can do a lot of these things myself. Granted, it may not be as impeccable of work as his would be but I can do it. So, instead of doing things around the house that I know my husband would like to do, I just say, “Hey babe, can you do this for me?” And he’s happy to do it. I mean, sure he helps around the house with the cleaning, dishes (he mainly does the dishes), takes out the trash, etc…but those are things that don’t give him much joy. So although he does the normal chores, he wants to do the “manly” things for me. It’s cute, so why not? 

I could go on and on about the things I learned over the past year about how to be a good (decent) wife, but this is a QUICK guide. I hope you all enjoyed this Quick Guide to Being a Good (Okay, Decent) Wife. There are so many other things I can point out…maybe I will have an extended version for you all sometime. ;)

Pregnancy Woes and Worries


Alright, it’s getting close to GAME TIME. No, I am not talking about the Super Bowl on Sunday. The Packers aren’t playing, so who cares anyway? :P

February 27th (my due date) is fast approaching and I am feeling a bit of anxiety.

I went to the OB yesterday and found that I am 1cm dialated, baby is head down, and he is estimated to weigh about 5.5-6 lbs right now. No big deal…I could be at 1cm for the next 4 weeks and I would be fine, I’m sure. But the issue here is…

my husband will be leaving on a detachment on February 5th-13th.

Sure. It’s only an 8 day detachment but he’s leaving RIGHT before the due date and with my family history, I just have a feeling I am going to have this baby while he’s gone. :(

I know, I know. It was my choice to join the military as it was his and we knew what was involved with it. There are MANY moms that go through this alone and their husbands are gone on DEPLOYMENT. I totally get it. But that doesn’t mean I am more settled because there’s a chance my husband might miss the birth. Especially when it’s NOT a deployment.

Sometimes, you just get screwed, hard, and there’s nothing you can really do about it. It truly sucks.

I’m just having a few panicky moments here and there when it comes to this. I mean, my best friend leaves on Friday and goes off to spend the next 3 years or so in Jacksonville and I won’t be able to call her to come pick me up if I go into labor. Anyone else I could call? They live right by the hospital and it would be crazy for me to have them drive from out there, over to me and then BACK to the hospital! That would just take so much time! Ambulance? Yeah, there’s a different system for things like that considering I live on base. And our base doesn’t do deliveries in their hospital anymore…if they did, I would drive my happy ass the whole 3 minutes there.

I know. I have been lucky. My husband has been around for the entire pregnancy. He’s been able to help me around the house when I needed it, helped with the nursery, lifted things I couldn’t, etc. But honestly? If I have our little boy while he’s gone, I would trade the entire 9 months of my husband being home for him to be there for the birth. I’m not the only one disappointed about it…my husband is really upset that he’s leaving.

Especially since he is leaving the command in A MONTH. UGH.

Anyway…my random rant is over. Let’s just hope our baby boy likes staying in there and won’t come out until Daddy comes home! Just hold out until Valentine’s Day little man! Your Daddy wants to meet you on your first day here! You can do it!!



My 10 Best of 2014


Here we are! New Year’s Eve and a new year headed our way!

Oh man, 2014 has been a HUGE year for me. I knew on my 25th birthday in January, that 25 was going to be a good year. :)

But you know what? 2015 is looking pretty good too! With the new year quickly approaching…I have been thinking a lot about this past year. Mainly, while I sit at my desk at work and distract my brain from falling asleep at the desk or while I am in my baby boy’s nursery setting it up.

Since I only started blogging at the end of September, you will learn quite a bit! So, here are MY best moments of 2014.

1. I learned that I can live on a Vegan diet….JUUUUST fine!
January 1st, 2014…I started the Beachbody Ultimate Reset. It’s 21 days of supplementation and learning how to tweak your diet. Cutting out certain foods and other bad things in your body. It also cleanses your body and helps you to get rid of the toxins. So, I made it through it and learned that there are things that I can eat that I won’t hate so much! I never knew I liked hummus, oranges, tempeh, lentils, and other awesome foods. I actually plan to do the Beachbody Ultimate Reset again after I have the baby to get my body back!!! It WILL work! And I will be talking ALLLLLLL about it in here! :) Get ready.
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2. I reached a 15.2% in body fat.
Over the past couple years, I have kicked my own ass to get in shape. I was fairly big before I joined the Navy and I lost quite a bit of weight in boot camp and the year after. It was a goal of mine to just get fit and healthy and I finally was getting there! I have talked a lot about weight and how numbers aren’t what is important. They really aren’t. BUT when I found this out, it was nice to know the major difference that had happened in a year. I started lifting more weights and getting smart about what I put into my body and it showed a major difference! Also, I was able to do different things that I never thought I would before.
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3. I got my first NEW car.
2014 Toyota Corolla is MINE. I traded in my Honda for a new car. I have never had a new car before and it actually is more beneficial to me to have a newer car than the one I had before. Who wants to keep paying for a car that’s not even worth what I’m paying!? NOT ME. So I traded up. :) My first car was super nice. A handmedown from my dear mother when my dad bought a new car and she got his. It was 2007 when I got the car and it was a 2001 Corolla. I really like Toyota’s. Unfortunately, I got into a car accident in 2011 and bought a 2000 Chevy Cavalier with the money I got from the insurance company after the accident. Then I joined the Navy and I wanted a car when I lived in the middle of nowhere. I still live there in case you’re wondering. So, I ended up with a 2004 Honda Accord. It was definitely time to trade up once I realized my car was 10 years old and I owed way too much on it. SO, there’s that story! haha. Thanks to the hubs for the help!!

4. I got to go to Hawaii.
Unfortunately, I went to Hawaii because I was on a short cruise on a Navy ship. But fortunately, I basically got to go to Hawaii for free. It’s not like I had to sail or fly there and pay out of pocket. lol. It was for RIMPAC. Maybe you heard about RIMPAC when you watched the movie Battleship. No…there aren’t any alien robots involved. Sorry to burst your bubble. It’s a Navy training exercise with other countries’ Navy’s. And really, I didn’t even get to do the RIMPAC part! lol. You will see why in #5. It was fun (Hawaii). And I got to have fun with my boyfriend (now husband).

5. We found out we were having a baby!
Jonathan and I were actually on our way out of Hawaii on the ship when I found out I was pregnant. That explains all of the tired nights in Hawaii and the cravings for carbs! haha. It was definitely surprising and exciting news. :) There were a few complications (with work and the baby) along the way but we are now headed into 32 weeks!! And when I was about 20 weeks, we found out we were having a boy! Love it! Now, I just need to get his nursery set up and finish getting everything together for this little tike!

6. We got engaged!
After Jonathan got home from RIMPAC, we spent about 2 weeks together and we both hopped a plane to Wisconsin and then to New York to meet the families. It was AMAZING meeting the families. BUUUUTTT, Hubby dearest had another thing in mind! When we were in New York, he took me to Taughanook Falls and proposed!!! It was incredibly beautiful!!! By the way, that word is pronounced TUH-gan-nuck. :) Just thought I would help you out. ;)
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7. We got married!!!
I became a wife! Planned a small ceremony in Manhattan Beach and had a few friends there and it was absolutely perfect. My dad even Skyped me while wearing a suit and was able to walk me down the aisle. It was amazing. We actually were engaged for a total of 25 days by the time we were married. It only took about 2 weeks to plan for the wedding. And you know what? It still was the most beautiful day of my life!!! If you want to read about our beautiful day, you’re more than welcome to here. I wrote a little bit about it when I first started this blog.

8. We moved into a house.
Well, we didn’t buy a huge house or anything…it’s a house provided for us on base. It’s also nothing fancy but it’s better than the one bedroom apartment that we were in previously. It’s a big deal to me. I feel like I am all grown up. How weird. lol. We moved into the house the weekend after we got married. It’s really like my life turned into some sort of a fairytale. A little backwards at times but it is so great. I love our home together.  <3

9. I started a blog.
‘Really?’ YES. I started a blog…I’ve had one for years but this one is way different. :) One I actually write in more often and care to talk to people about. I also am more out there for once. It’s nice. :) It’s actually a big deal that I started a serious one this year. I will be able to use this blog as an outlet for my emotions, take a break from life, learn from others about how to be a good mommy, and also to be able to inspire people in their health and fitness. So, I hope that 2015 will bring some awesome life experiences to talk about!

10. Welcome to our family Miss Violet!
Hubs and I got a puppy this year!! Her name is Violet and I am pretty sure I wrote an entire post…or 5 about her. She will be 4 months old on the 3rd and she has blessed my life immensely. She’s teaching me a lot about parenting and patience. Violet is the cutest puppy I have ever seen and I never knew I was a dog person!! Guess I am now! :) I regret nothing about getting her and every day, I look at her and say “I am so happy we found you.” I love her. :)

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now!! 10 big moments of 2014! Wow. That’s more than I thought! I could probably write a few more but I will leave it at the 10. I don’t want to bore the crap out of my beautiful readers. ;) Looking back, this makes me think that 2015 is going to be lame! Let’s hope not…I mean…I know what #1 on next year’s list will be! I get to become a Mommy. :) I CAN’T WAIT!


Are you?!


Dating My Husband Pt. 2


What’s that? Looks like we are in pretty comfy clothing. But the title says that I am dating my husband…YES! I posted a couple weeks ago about dating my husband. It may sound weird to some people but it’s really not that complicated. You can, indeed, still date your husband while you are married. That “dating” stage doesn’t just die out because you both have tied the knot. I talked about that in my last post. I figured I would continue to do these posts since J and I have decided that we will NOT let this marriage die! Again, like I said in my last post about dating your spouse, we have seen far too many married couples die out because of one person or even both people giving up, life gets too hard for them and they just, stop loving each other. That will NOT be us. Plus, dating each other is fun. So, I wanted to share with you about our Friday night date night!

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6 Observations of Being a Newlywed


So, for those of you who are new to the blog, I am a newlywed. You can read about that here and here. This post isn’t a complaint but more of an overall observation. And observation of what happens when you go from the dating world into the married world…nothing really changed. Just the title and a few rings. It’s crazy! My husband and I have been living together for a little over a year now and just got married at the end of September. So, living with him and figuring things out about him is not new. But for some reason, I am finding little things different now that we are married and have moved into a house. Maybe it has to do with my being pregnant, I sit back more and watch things, and we have a puppy? I don’t know. But here’s some things I have noticed!

1. You share EVERYTHING.
I always shared things with my husband. When he was my boyfriend, I shared things with him. We didn’t really have anything to hide from each other so we shared things. Like, the bed, obviously. We take showers together, we share stories, we share clothes…well, mostly he shares clothes with me like big, comfy T-shirts! Hell, I have even worn his boxers before because I needed an extra pair of undies. TMI? Never. But what have I noticed we started sharing now that I didn’t know we did before? Nail clippers. He has his own set of nail clippers and I have about…4. I know where his are and I know where mine are. The other night, I was laying in bed and he was just getting home from work and I heard him go into the bathroom, go under the sink, and unzip my nail polish bag. What for? The nail clippers. Then I hear, “clip, clip, clip.” There really isn’t anything wrong with this but I found it funny that he went for mine. Probably because I am more organized and keep things where I like them and are easy to find. Go figure he goes for mine. Haha. Other little things like, hair combs, razors, tweezers, facial cleansers, shaving cream, cars, and other things I can’t think of right now. It’s just funny how much closer you get to each other.

2. Hogging the bed.
Remember in number 1 where I just said you share the bed? Yes. We have shared the same bed for the past year. When we first started dating, actually I think we were still testing the waters, he ended up buying a new bed. He broke up with his girlfriend and they were living together and he was like…”I need a new bed. Want to go bed shopping with me?” Like the weirdos we are, I went. It was fine. I got to test out beds and it was actually kind of fun. He ended up getting a Queen size posturepedic mattress along with 2 tempurpedic pillows. He must not have been thinking that this relationship was going to go anywhere. A queen size? ;) Just kidding. Anyway, when we were dating it was all about the cuddling. I don’t know, we have this thing where you’re not allowed to sleep apart. Not saying we always have to be on top of each other or anything but…a hand, leg, your butts (lol), something has to be touching the other person. So, it was fine and dandy for us because well, we would end up cuddling all night anyway. But now….NOW he does this thing where he sleeps diagonally! What is that?! He already takes up most of the bed and then goes for the diagonal sleeping position. Then puts his leg on me. Babe, I am pregnant and I am always hot. You cover the fan with your body so I don’t want your leg on me. Where did this come from?! Maybe it’s my growing belly, the fact that I have a body pillow on my side with another pillow stacked on top for my hips, or that our puppy is in bed with us and she sleeps at the foot of the bed. I don’t know. But he is now an official bed hog. He’s married now, why does he need to share? :P

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A Wedding In Nevada


No. Nobody got married in Vegas or Reno. But a couple friends of ours got married in Lake Tahoe! It’s beautiful up in the mountains! A bit chilly, but when you’re from Wisconsin, it’s not that big of a deal.

Just kidding. It’s a big deal. Wearing dresses or skirts in this cold sucked but was totally worth it when I got to see my friends get married! One of the coolest things about your friends getting married, is when they were inspired to do it because they were able to be a part of yours. If any of you remember my post back in September about our wedding called “Wedding on a Budget” we got married in Manhattan Beach and planned that wedding in about 2 weeks. Well, my friends were inspired and wanted to do something like that! There’s took a little longer to plan (about a month) and they were able to get family out there. Crazy thing is, we are all military so it’s hard to get family out to where you’re at not to mention, my friend was on a detachment in Nevada and her hubby-to-be was on a detachment to Michigan and Florida before this happened! Anything can happen! That’s for sure.

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Dating My Husband


Dating doesn’t stop once you get married. Dating doesn’t stop once you’re pregnant. And I’m willing to bet that dating doesn’t stop once you have kids either. ;)

My husband and I like to make sure we don’t forget to date each other. Little surprises here and there, going out to eat, to a movie, whatever it is that you both like to do together. We like to joke around and say we have numerous dates a week because we go to the gym together. It works, but not always what I am talking about! Plus, he moves to the night shift next week and we won’t be able to spend a lot of time together so we did date night! I wasn’t expecting it!

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